I know some people are scared with this pandemic going on. While I’ve been enjoying all the alone time, there’s been instances where I wondered about the future: how will all of this end up? Will more people die, or will there be a happy ending? The most confident person saying modern medicine will prevail probably has some underlying fears they are hoping don’t come to fruition.
So to those nervous about the future, I say: be strong. This will not last forever. Know that whatever the outcome is, it will get better. Be brave for those around you and help one another survive. You are a warrior, and even the strongest of warriors stop to shed a tear every now and then before picking up their weapon and heading back into battle.
And that’s what this is: a battle for staying true to ourselves. Just because you are frustrated and going stir crazy in your house does not give you the right to take it out on others. Know that others are feeling frustration and helplessness as well. I read somewhere that domestic abuse calls are on the rise—let us take a minute and walk away from our partner in the heat of the moment so harsh words don’t lead down dark paths.
When my husband and I argue, near the climax we take a break from each other. He goes and strews on his phone, and I go and stew on the computer. Contrary to all the posts I write, we aren’t perfect. But the one thing that makes us work well together is communication—we know when to back off; when to ask for a moment; when to compliment the hurt party.
Once when my husband lost his job, instead of getting upset and yelling at him how is he going to provide, I hugged and complimented him on all the wonderful things he was able to do, and promised him, this too shall pass. He was down, frustrated, wounded, but I didn’t take my insecurities about the situation out on him. I wanted him to come back stronger.
And you know what? He landed an even better job.
Communication can be critical to keeping our cool during these trying times. Just because the virus is ripping through lives doesn’t mean we should tear down our relationships too.
You are with your spouse for a bouquet of reasons: remember them in the troublesome moments and reflect on how you would like to be treated. It is worth it to spare each other shouting matches if it can be helped and look together to the future when we can all get on with our lives, but with a better sense of ourselves.
You are a warrior. Remember that.